Poetry

March 17, 2016 Poetry , POETRY / FICTION

By

Rod Roldan-Roldan

 

 

Unidentity

Sons of Whitman sons of Poe

sons of Lorca & Rimbaud

or their dark daughters

poets of another breath

poets of another vision

Who among you will speaks of revolution

Who among you still unscrews

the lock of the doors

in this revisionist decade?

Lawrence Ferlinghetti (in Adieu à Charlot)

 

 

 

God

why don’t you apologize

for making me unachievable?

                                                        ***

I started with what shall I be

I switched into what should I be

then I changed to what am I

the answer is still the same

                                                        ***

Am I a reality?

Am I a truth?

I don’t even know my shape

nor the light of my name

                                                        ***

Father

are you absent?

your silence forgets

I am made of words

                                                        ***

Time of mirrors is over

I want to be alone

play the silence of being

touch my soul

find out my name

                                                        ***

Such a solid absence

dragging on emptiness

whenever I ask mother Earth

the smell of memory

                                                        ***

Sweet swallow coming back home

without the feeling of your land

searching among your blood

the whistle of your name

                                                        ***

Deep in the abyss

where heart becomes clear

where thoughts disappear

where light springs up

I shall be

                                                        ***

Why such a hurry without a smile

ask me my name

should I exist

the end is always the same

                                                        ***

I was dreaming I was a bird

flying into the sky of my wings

when the wind made me discover

I was just crossing the space of my feet

                                                        ***

I was flying among suns and glorious nights

within the density of my soul

when the angels were named words

and the ground desire

                                                        ***

Since I have been absent from my soul

tell me brother

what is the name of this land

where silence has been banished from?

                                                        ***

Lonesome fighter

lost among your brothers

where have you left the sun of your seeds?

                                                        ***

Your love does not tell me my name

your face does not show me my feelings

your country does not state me my land

your peace does not indicate me my way

                                                        ***

I had been looking for a mirror named identity

full of dust I found out the glass

where no face answered me

I just gave up my search

when I grasped my number

don’t blame me

pragmatism seized me

                                                        ***

Where have they gone the last fallen leaves

through dust and light

I have been looking for them

silence and haze

dark watches me

                                                        ***

Like words losing their meaning

among mist and breeze

I saw the sparkling shadows

answering my fallen loves

sliding away

beyond the windows of the night

                                                        ***

Sweet flight of dream

drifting among lost skies

blow up my oars of reality

erase my false name

take me far away

call me flying tree

I have got wings and roots in my heart

and no land in my mind

                                            ***

Fate is late

faith tell me anything

time has a date

hell or heaven just words

there is only one gate

                                                        ***

Frozen dreams in my heart

forgotten landscapes in my mind

toys in the attic delivered to time

a taste of silence

a sound of oblivion

                                                        ***

I got a muzzled smile

an official number

and no shadow of a name

why should I identify my ghost

oh father Sun forgive me

I dropped out my anger

I miss your heat

                                                        ***

Naked body naked walls

some tea some rice

a window a sand garden

the rain the silence

my dialogue

                                                        ***

The road and I

maybe a song a tale

origin/destination unknown

maybe a tear a smile

time rushing

the road and I

                                                        ***

Words

just words

trying to hide away my prison

vanishing shadows of a game

words

just tired words

springing up again

dropping off hope

when the rainy sunset shakes my soul

                                                        ***

Under the rain

when father Sun hides his smile

when night shows up

just pull off the mask

and walk along with your own words

wishing nothing but the deep call of heart

over there

where land marries your skin

joy or sorrow of being

name your soul and wait for the wind

                                                        ***

No flag

no roots

just wings without destination

and the unsealed destiny

more than an escape

less than a choice

maybe a freak from the stars

                                                        ***

Remember the song of the Earth

when water was clean

when the sky was blue

I used to trust the word loyalty

remember oh my son

when I was an animal

when I was a man

                                                        ***

Never mind if I am coming from an old lie

I got courage to walk alone into my truth

never mind if the price is high

being proud I do not ask

I pay for

                                                        ***

Dark bird of passion

flying over the unknown feelings

tell father Sun

I am waiting for my release

to rise my beloved Liberty

and sing her glory

                                                        ***

Far away

beyond mountains and oceans

in that clear land where I may breathe

where my body follows the sound of the trees

without fear of being myself

without shame of using my own words

                                                        ***

Be strong

be mad

delete your mask

escape from the cage

destroy it

and tell the daisies the Sun is your father

                                                        ***

Words are a game

not a shame

passion may be just a word

seeking its own name

which happens to be just a word

                                                        ***

Past tense

old tree blue song golden child

present tense

broken roots unfinished desires

and the desperate journey into my blood

                                                     ***

Far away from today

in that golden land

where gods get drunk

beyond everything which has a name

I shall clear my screen

forget what I learned

start again

clean

                                                        ***

Drop out the word never

erase the word always

maybe you will find my place

near the lake

under the moonlight

around the fire

among the wizards

                                                       ***

Lord of peace love flesh and desire

Lord of universe

being the son of father Sun

I proclaim the honor of being myself

make me good

make me fuck

                                                        ***

Done

settled with a single word

no

farewell poet

print in your heart

the embargo of being yourself

                                                        ***

Tell me the sound of hope

I am so blind when I look at the human kind

that I am afraid to forget the smell of love

                                                        ***

Last night I met the other one

somewhere in the world

crying like a kid

looking for his own voice

in the dark exile of the just one

                                                        ***

I remember you

sweet faith of youth

passing by with a name

when I was more than a tag

in the land of the frozen masks

                                                        ***

Don’t ever follow me

I’ve got the madness of freedom

between flesh and skin

you may get lost

before you discover the meaning of my steps

                                                        ***

Keep out your gods saints heroes chamans

and your fucking auto-help books

I’m just seeking out the wisdom of love

no need for trash to fill out emptiness

                                                        ***

Old Revolution time

taste of dream

when we used to forbid to forbid

and forget what we learned

smell of oblivion

when dawn is red

                                                        ***

The joy of being

makes me cry

when the rage of living

makes me angry

                                                        ***

A time for me

under the rain

following the wind

facing solitude

mad of being

                                                        ***

Don’t mix up dream and austerity

it’s an explosive

and yet it’s my way

Fire!

                                                        ***

My grandfather used to hate the King

my father God

I hate Globalization

                                                        ***

I don’t feel like going shopping

when soul business

is calling me home

                                                        ***

Don’t be afraid

although my soul is the only reality

I don’t represent any social danger

times have changed

TV now replaces the gibbet

                                                        ***

Once upon a time

some men used to be great

nowadays they are all big

Lord pray for the Pig

                                                        ***

Please respect my rights

I don’t want anything

except wishing nothing

                                                        ***

I made my way

throughout stupidity

without stopping for revelations

                                                        ***

I am sick

I was blind

I drank a certain globalization

I feel like a termite

                                                        ***

Don’t teach me profit

I kept my wings

and although I still don’t know how to live

it’s too early to die

                                                        ***

Oh Lord forgive my pride

they still need heroes

while I’m just looking for silence

                                                        ***

Since heaven is tired

the last youth is pressing me

beyond any reference

for life is short and nothing may happen

except existing

                                                        ***

Why don’t they forgive love?

why do they only accept what they learned?

oh safety of stupidity

murdering passion

                                                        ***

Brothers of mind

forgive me

I hate heroes and mediocrity

and yet I’m doing nothing except writing

                                                        ***

I am thirsty

and god is gone

who could tell me

the way to Water?

                                                        ***

Life is just an instant

death eternity

hold me on the edge of the abyss

while I’m still dressed up by light

love me please

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love

Love – thou art Veiled –                   

A few – behold thee –

Smile – and alter – and prattle – and die –

Bliss – were an Oddity – without thee –

Nicknamed by God –

Eternity –

Emily Dickinson (in Love – thou art high -)

 

 

 

The voice of my heart denies

the reason of my mind

and my eyes refusing discipline

light up a single word

stay

                                                        ***

Sometimes

when my fingers

are unable to reach your lips

when my ears

are unable to describe the sound of your words

when my eyes

are unable to seize the light of your look

love is named pain

                                                        ***

All these feelings

dragging on my heart

burning my soul

scaring my mind

resumed in a single word

love

                                                        ***

Put away your mask

delete your make-up

overcome your fear

show me love

                                                        ***

Why are you so far away

and so close your skin?

Why is your voice a joke

and a truth your eyes?

Why are words an easy game

and love a painful call?

                                                        ***

Come

let me lay my dream on your smile

let me fly into the sky of your hope

let me grasp the color of your words

let me pick up the flowers of your silence

let me be for a second the madness of your desire

come

                                                         ***

Sweet sin of my dream

come down to me

I shall fly to the land of love

with fear far away from me

                                                        ***

Where have you been

shadow of desire

I rode through the night

without drinking your smell

please come

I’m still wild

                                                        ***

Let your lips

climb my lingam

let your tongue

be the tide of my sperm

enter the Word upon my soul

                                                        ***

Here is my Body

lick him

suck him

let him enter yours

enjoy him before the sunset

for life is short and the answer unknown

                                                        ***

Such a long time without tasting your skin

such a long time without reading your mind

such a long time without testing your heart

                                                        ***

And when your tongue creates

among drops and grass

the roads to my body

up to my lingam’s heights

picturing the perfum of my spasm

I coagulate the taste of life

beyond the instant

                                                        ***

Don’t wait for an answer

when my fingers are unable to connect your skin

don’t expect tenderness

when flesh doesn’t catch fire

don’t knock on my heart

when you seize your feelings

                                                        ***

Gone time of love

when my body was free

when yours was free

when bodies were available

before fear made them just a long distance voice

closing the century

                                                        ***

Lonesome night

I feel your mouth over there

and on my belly your hair

but it’s just a short flight

before my right hand plays love

with the remaining of desire

to fill the empty side

                                                 ***

Love

come

make me spring up

oh angel of identity

within my name

beyond eternity

                                                        ***

Under the moonlight

like a holy animal waiting for you

with my heights up to heaven

to fulfill your desire

                                                        ***

Tomorrow is already turning over the page of your face

and yet today I’m still painting the killing of love

and yesterday is becoming the whiteness of emptiness

                                                        ***

Not even a stolen kiss

not even a frozen dream

just the naked night

including your absence

excluding love

                                                        ***

I shall be there

in the endless land of Words

picking up the flowers of desire

in the silence of your eyes

crossing the landscape of your body

                                                        ***

Round trip love

first leg

champagne dream caviar

second leg

some drops of gall in emptiness

                                                        ***

And yet beloved love

waiting without hoping

searching the tune of roots

before destination

                                                        ***

Love

one way trip

no luggage but light dust fever

and some coins of memory

                                                        ***

And yet imperial love

lightening the fire of universe

banishing lies

springing up the Verb

                                                        ***

It must be love

such a trembling skin

such a flying heart

the pregnant word

and the silence of the loser

naming that strange feeling

that must be love

                                                        ***

Love under silence

crowed and wet

wearing the desperate song

of the lonesome rider

searching out his own voice

                                                        ***

Come on

tell me the legend of the wind

when it blows up your heart

too heavy for flying

too light for staying

                                                        ***

So take my hand

and taste the smell of my flight

far away from the Termite’s land

riding among angels and shine

the carnal words

                                                        ***

Kiss me through my words

touch me through my look

I shall drink the breath of your eyes

and rest for the rest of my passion

                                                        ***

Stop asking what you know

don’t you see love dazzling?

Stop asking for time

don’t you see life running away?

oh bring me roses and wine

and step into my heart before dawn

                                                        ***

I

lonesome knight-errant

on the dazzle road

offer you the unreachable land of the words

where love has no name

                                                        ***

Oh love

love that glitters

over passion or light

among gods

in the endless sky of the lost desires

listen to my heart

opening the gate of the abyss

                                                        ***

Should I die gathering words

should I lie to my truth

should I cry my transgression

please post my love

before the end of my term

                                                      ***

Go ahead

tell me I cannot

say it is forbidden

I want the knife of life on my throat

transgression

                                                        ***

Oh Lord

the world fills me

and yet I am empty

please give me silence

                                                        ***

So far so close

so deep so cold

oh autumn wind

sweeping away the remaining feelings

like the last fallen leaves

while the whistle blows

in the last station of my heart

***

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rod Roldan-Roldan

R.Roldan-Roldan (or David Haize). Brazilian author. Born in Spain. Grew up in Morocco. French education. Lives in Brazil. Ten years stuck in a city-state for being stateless. Cosmopolitan. Internationalist. Militant. Libertarian. Hedonistic. “Cursed writer”. He gave up his job (manager for a corporation) in order to write and he has known hunger. 31 published books (novels, short stories, theatre, poetry, epistolary). Writes social, politics and cinema articles for a newspaper. His literature is surrealist and focuses on identity, sex, exile, metalanguage, silence, existential search for meaning and fury of living. He loves art. One philosopher: Nietzsche. One poet: Rimbaud. One novelist: Stendhal. One playwright: Euripides. One movies director: Visconti. One film: Il Gattopardo. One actress: Vanessa Redgrave. One actor: Javier Bardem. One singer: Léo Ferré. One composer: Beethoven. One painter: Hieronymus Bosch. One folklore: russian. One city: Paris. One culture: french.

His books (not all of them) can be found on www.authorcentral.amazon.com

His blog: www.davidhaize.wordpress                                             

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