Osinbajo and the conspiracy of nine fingers

Reuters photo

 

By

Prince Charles Dickson

 

“Our wife, our wife”: come midnight and we will know whose wife she really is.

 

Did you hear…”Osinbajo is very presidential, he has action” (Really)

Some people said, “He should not deviate from Buhari’s policies” (But why should he)

Did you see Osinbajo’s wife on TV the other day she looks the part (abeg which part)

Some sabi-sabi people even said, “he is governing from Lagos”(Anyway that was once our capital too)

 

Don’t mind them, El-Rufai is in control (With all the wahala at his backyard)

Saraki is angling to be Vice President, but Osinbajo won’t have it (Chai this people don sell us, Saraki should finish with Code of Conduct Bureau)

Even the North has given Osinbajo six conditions (I wonder why six and not eight or twenty)

 

Actually we currently have three presidents, Buhari, Osinbajo, and others…

If the Pastor says “you will be promoted” will Osinbajo say AMEN.

Hear some Imams are spreading the rumor that Baba was poisoned (By who)

And some group claim that they warned Baba about his kitchen arrangement

How about that gist that finally an Awolowo would be in the Presidency

Also these days, Mr. President seems to be speaking to everyone on phone, I am particular about him telling Adesina whom he now refers to as Femi that Nigerians are “Mischief Makers”.

 

Going forward have you heard that Osinbajo is responsible for the appreciating Naira (But he was head of the Economic Team).

Oh did I forget, some said Osinbajo is the function of the President’s magnanimity, you recall Idiagbon too, and Mr. Buhari loves to work from behind.

 

Yes, I equally saw that write up on, those that have visited Osinbajo since his boss traveled on vacation.

And sure we get to read a lot on social platforms, including the recent exhortation to pray seriously for Osinbajo, because of because; We are praying for Buhari too, and some are praying for you and I know.

Nigeria is one hell of a place, and it is not out of place that I suffer monochopsis these days, meanwhile that “big word” means; the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.

Really is Professor Pastor Osinbajo to the rescue, how come silly Nigerians suddenly think he’s got some magic wand, the same Nigerians who did not believe in the APC or Change mantra, would it not be safe to say that what is manifest if indeed any, is a function of the promises made by the duo.

Why is it that we are so foolish, and in the words of the Apostle Paul who has bewitched us, why are we so myopic in our hate for each other, so much that I see how some Yorubas are rejoicing or how some Christians are upbeat and how some Muslims are threatening thunder, fire and electricity, should anything happen to Mr. Buhari (of course we need the latter).

So I ask has Osinbajo made any policy and the last time I checked, all those that say this dude is Presidential never stated that he was Vice Presidential. Nigerians are so…before I am accused of saying what I do not know.

 

Let me end this admonition in this manner; Once upon a time there lived a king. The king was very kind and ruled his people very well. One day he was cutting an apple with the knife and accidentally cut his finger. The king cried aloud and his minister who was devotee of Krishna came running and saw that the king has cut his finger.

The minister tying a cloth to the king’s finger said, “Dear king, don’t worry, whatever happen its is mercy of Krishna. So be happy and thank your luck and thank Krishna”

The king got very angry and said, “What nonsense you are talking. The blood is coming out. I am crying in pain. You say this is mercy of Krishna. You are a big fool. I will throw you in jail”. Shouting thus, the king got his minister thrown in jail. The minister smiled and said aloud, “Whatever happened is mercy of Krishna! Thank you Krishna!”

But one fine morning the fat king went alone for hunting in the forest. There were no guards and no ministers with him. He soon lost his way in the forest and landed in an enemy’s tribal kingdom.

Suddenly the tribal king and his soldiers rounded up the king and tied him to a tree. The tribal soldiers then drank and danced around the king and shouted, “Let this king be sacrificed to our Kali”. Shouting thus, they all prepared the king for the big sacrifice to Kali devi.

The king was sad, as there was no minister with him to advise how to escape. He was weeping with tears running down his eyes.

The tribal king and the priest came to inspect the king and saw that the king had a bandage on his finger.

The priest then said to the tribal king, “Sir, this king has already cut his finger and the blood has already come out of him. But for our Kali we need fresh blood and a whole body without any cuts. Therefore, this king is unfit to be sacrificed and let him go back to his people.” The tribal king agreed and set the king free.

The king got back to his kingdom and related the story to his minister who was in jail. The minister then smiled and said, “See I told you that whatever happens is mercy of Krishna and is for our own good!

On that day you cut your finger it saved your life! And when you put me in jail it also saved my life!” The minister said smiling.

The king was surprised and asked, “How’s that!”

The minister replied, “See, wherever you go I have to be with you. But on that day I was in jail. So I did not come with you. If I had come with you, the tribal king would have sacrificed me because my body was whole and no cuts on me. This way I too was saved!

You cutting your finger and me going to jail both happened to our own good! That is what I believed. And this is the moral philosophy that everyone should believe… “Whatever happens; happens to our own good and it is mercy of Krishna!”

 

If we strongly believe in this moral philosophy we will really stop worrying and make our lives happier and happier… forever and ever! Putting our lives in the hands of Krishna is the most secure way to live our life.

Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare/ Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare.

On intent, hence the number of Krishna devotees is almost negligible I have used them, but the lesson thereof is that there is no Osinbajo, or Buhari, it is about the success of this administration which in turn is the success of Nigeria and Nigerians. The devoid created by Mr. Buhari’s extended leave, despite the handover to an acting, has again exposed all the cracks that we are still a divided nation, and still largely do not know what we desire, and continue to be tossed, continually running from the issues, trading and chasing shadows, and it seems we will be on this path for a while, how much time do we have, indeed—Only time will tell.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

princecharlesdickson

Prince Charles Dickson

Currently Prince Charles, is based out of Jos, Plateau State, and conducts field research and investigations in the Middle Belt Region of Nigeria with an extensive reach out to the entire North and other parts. Prince Charles worked on projects for UN Women, Search for Common Ground, and International Crisis Group, among others. He is an alumnus of the University of Jos and the prestigious Humanitarian Academy at Harvard and Knight Center For Journalism, University of Texas at Austin. A doctoral candidate of Georgetown University

Born in Lagos State (South West Nigeria), Prince Charles is proud of his Nigerian roots. He is a Henry Luce Fellow, Ford Foundation grantee and is proficient in English, French, Yoruba Ibo and Hausa. Married with two boys, and a few dogs and birds.

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